The number of the least...

I have decided that “one thousand six hundred and eight” is now officially my LEAST favorite number...

That’s right, I’m making a bold proclamation. And I have a strong feeling I’ll be sticking to it. “One thousand six hundred and eight” just holds no joy for me any longer... It’s not a fair decision to make I’m sure, but all the same, from this day forth, simply mentioning “one thousand six hundred and eight” will encourage me to do nothing but mutter and shudder... as i'm doing right now...

[shudder]

Yes, even as I write this, it is painful to THINK about the number “one thousand six hundred and eight” ...much less type “one thousand six hundred and eight” ...or, god forbid, dare to speak “one thousand six hundred and eight”

Which of course means that I should probably stop repeating it over and over and over.

“One thousand six hundred and eight”

[shudder]

“One thousand six hundred and eight”

[shudder]


...


Ooooo... Do it again

“One thousand six hundred and eight”

[shudder]


“But why Flarf” you may ask, “why does this number hold itself in such ill-favor with you?”

Ok, so you probably wouldn't ask that using such a convoluted and mismatched set of words and phrases, but cut me some slack... i'm angry.

And it is a fair question, so to begin to answer it, I offer the following evidence...

In computerspeak, 1608 is the error number assigned to an inability to Create InstallDriver Instance... an inability to Create InstallDriver Instance?!?!?! That’s some pretty pure hatred right there...

It also marks the birth year of poet John Milton... the man who wrote Paradise Lost... the work that, among other things, goes into great detail about the origins of a real bad dude... THE bad dude in fact... the baddest dude of them all... no, I don't mean Darth Vader (though he's pretty fickin' badass)... I’m talking about Satan here... Lucifer... Beelzebub... The Dark Lord of all that is Oogilly Boogilly.

And I might add, it’s also the number of bed spaces for on-campus students at the University of North Florida...

Ok, so that in and of itself isn't actually a BAD thing...

But... but... how bout this one? ...in the year of the Greeks one thousand six hundred and eight (A.D. 1296--97), the victorious king came down to pass the winter in the city of BAGHDAD, and Mar Catholicus remained in MARAGHAH. And it fell out that a certain man, who was called by the name of SHENAKH EL-TAMUR (or SHAING EL-TAIMUR, or SHAKH EL-TAIMUR) came into MARAGHAH, and he cast about a report that he had with him an Edict ordering that every one who not abandon Christianity and deny his Faith should be killed.

Killed?!?!?

Hey, not that I’m the world’s leading proponent of organized religion or anything, but promoting closin’ up shop on some dude just cuz of how he gets his groove on, well that seems wrong man...

So you see what I mean?

“One thousand six hundred and eight”

[shudder]

It’s just a bad, bad number.


Oh, and it also just so happens to be the appraised cost of repairs to my six-month-old car...

Repairs that I have a $1,000 deductible on...

Repairs that are necessary due to an accident that a policeman thought was too minor (and involving so little damage) that it wasn’t even worth writing up...

Repairs that I don’t really have the funds to pay for or the inclination to undertake.



...not that I’m bitter or anything.



“One thousand six hundred and eight”

...the joy is gone.

[shudder]